


Beginnings and Ends

by Cyan (vehicroids)



Category: South Park
Genre: I don't know why I'm struggling with tags for these atm uh, Light Angst, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-19
Updated: 2018-10-21
Packaged: 2019-08-04 13:29:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16347605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vehicroids/pseuds/Cyan
Summary: Summer was drawing to a close, and Stan wanted to do one last thing before it was over.(Written for Stenny Week. Day 5 - Growing Up)





	1. Chapter 1

Summer vacation always felt endless as a kid, but when September hit, Stan was struck with an awful sadness. This year, he dreaded September more than ever. High school was over - they had all graduated, and now they were all waiting to move for college.

That part was what scared Stan.

He and his friends had stuck together through everything except distance. They would all meet new people in college, make new friends, and the communication would cease. Inevitably, Kenny, Eric and Kyle would be nostalgic names on his Facebook list, something to cry over on the loneliest and worst nights. How many people stayed friends after high school? Stan didn’t want to think about it, but it was all he could think about.

He could already feel the drift. They never hung out as a quartet anymore; Kyle refused to hang out with Cartman, Cartman didn’t want to deal with Kyle being a baby, and Kenny was too tired for their drama. Stan didn’t care - at least it would mean they were together.

This wasn’t the first time he had lost his friends, and that only made it  _ worse _ . This time, however, Stan wasn’t going to give up. Summer was ending, and the four of them needed to hang out one last time. He wasn't stupid enough to believe they would have another chance like this once college started.

Stan invited the other three over to his place - while it wasn't exciting, it was at least fun. They could play video games like they used to for a few hours and pretend college wasn't right around the corner. It was short notice, but they lived close enough for it to not be an inconvenience.

His phone buzzed twice, and Stan smiled. How excitement was short lived as he read the messages.

‘ _ Sorry dude, Mom needs me for something :/ _ ’

‘ _ no thx i'm busy NOT going to your gay get together lmao _ ’

At least Eric was honest in his disinterest. Why Kyle couldn't do the same, he didn't know. Stan didn't care. He dropped his phone on his bed and picked up his guitar, idly strumming a couple of chords. He didn't feel like playing properly, just something to keep himself busy. He would soon pack it away with the rest of his belongings, shoved in the back of a car and taken on a long trip across the country.

His pick slipped in between the strings and fell inside the guitar. Stan sighed, tilting it upside down to get the stupid little triangle out. No matter what, it refused to come out. Stupid little--

Frustrated, Stan tossed the guitar onto the bed, landing with a soft thump. Everything was slipping away, and not even music was helping. He sat down on the edge of his bed, looking around. Everything around him was the same as it was just six months ago, but why did it feel so different?

He held his hands over his face, leaning forwards with his hands on his knees. He closed his eyes, sucking in his breath through his fingers. Stan wasn't going to cry over this. He wouldn't cry over things changing, and he wouldn't cry over college. He wouldn't cry over his friends, and he wouldn't cry over the thought of things never being the same again.

Yet he still cried over these all these things and more. One day, he would feel ridiculous for having cried over his childhood friends, and it would no longer matter. For now, in the privacy of his own room, what did it matter?

“Knock knock, guess who--"

Stan looked up to see Kenny standing at his bedroom door. Kenny's smile faded as he looked at Stan with tears streaming down his face. Kenny closed the door behind him and sat beside Stan, draping an arm around his shoulders. Stan immediately leaned into the embrace.

“How many times am I gonna find you crying alone?” Kenny sighed.

“Too many times,” Stan sniffled, wiping his eyes.

“Do you wanna talk about it?”

He did, but he felt pathetic talking about it. Stan was the biggest baby, but Kenny usually listened without laughing, even when he held a crying drunk Stan. He couldn't admit that he was crying over his world ending - not that it was the first time he'd cried over something similar. This time, it involved Kenny.

“You're the only one who didn't bail on me,” Stan mumbled.

“Come on, you've cried over dumb shit. I know it's not just because those two bailed on you, though,” Kenny said.

Stan said nothing, instead pulling himself closer and closing his eyes. Kenny hummed, and the vibrations in his chest always soothed Stan. Oh God, he really was a baby.

“I'll miss you,” Stan said.

Kenny laughed a little, burying his face in Stan's hair. He suddenly felt gross, hyper aware that he had not showered in a couple of days. The best thing about Kenny was that he didn't seem to care about Stan being gross sometimes.

“I'll miss you, too,” Kenny said, running his arm. “You scared about missing us?”

Stan nodded. “I know this is gonna be it, dude. I don't wanna say goodbye.”

Kenny sighed. “You've always sucked at goodbyes.”

Stan would have complained if it wasn't true. He wiped his eyes again, trying to calm down. It wasn't going well. This was a stupid thing to cry over, especially when he was the only one who cared.

“Maybe it's a good thing they didn't turn up. No goodbyes, no tears,” Kenny said. “You know Cartman doesn't do genuine.”

Then what was Kyle's excuse? The thought alone was enough to set Stan off all over again. He felt so indescribably  _ sad _ that it hurt inside. He furiously wiped at his eyes, but the tears fell faster than he could catch them.

“I'm sorry,” Stan sighed.

“Don't be sorry, I get it. You're sensitive.”

Kenny pinched his cheek, and Stan whined. He batted Kenny's hand away and sat up, adjusting himself. At least he stopped crying. He glanced over at the calendar still hanging on his wall, with his moving date circled in bright red pen - next week.

He looked at Kenny, who smiled back at Stan. It was just them, and nothing mattered anymore. If he said something stupid, who cared? This would be it.

“I'm gonna miss you the most,” Stan said.

“Aw, Stan, you don't have to lie. As long as you miss me more than Cartman, that's all I care about,” he said with a snort.

Stan laughed. “Deal. But I'm serious, dude.”

He shuffled on his bed. Stan tried to face Kenny, but he couldn't look him in the eye. He wanted to reach out and grab his hand, but instead, he kept them in his lap. He looked down at his hands, then up at Kenny, then back at his hands.

“I… It doesn't matter now, I guess. But,” Stan sighed, staring at his hands. He felt bile rise in his stomach. “But I like you. I really like you. I-- Fuck it. Kenny, I love you.”

The silence that followed crushed Stan. He wasn't expecting Kenny to dramatically accept his love, but he wasn't expecting stunned silence. What the hell was Stan doing, anyway? He bit his cheek.

Kenny put a hand on his, and Stan looked up at him. His face was red, but his smile was bright and big. Stan's stomach did back flips - Kenny was something else entirely.

“I wish you'd fucking said something sooner,” Kenny sighed.

Before Stan had a chance to argue, Kenny was kissing him. Stan's hand rested on his jaw, keeping him in place. Now that he had Kenny, he didn't want to let him go.

“I didn't know,” Stan mumbled against his lips, “that I'd have a chance.”

Kenny pulled away to look into his eyes. Stan was certain not even angels had eyes that pretty.

“Dumbass. I love you.”

Stan threw his arms around Kenny, and Kenny laid down, pulling Stan to lay over him. Stan peppered his lips and his face with kisses - there was never enough of Kenny. He laughed softly, and that laugh was better than any music Stan had ever heard. He was utterly useless.

Stan brushed some stray hair from Kenny's face, looking down at him with a smile. He was so damn cute. There were no awkward questions, no  _ what are we _ . They were just together, kissing in Stan's bed, exchanging whispered love confessions.

Even if it was just for today, it was better than nothing. Stan could at least say he had taken a chance with Kenny.


	2. Chapter 2

Stan's laptop made strange noises as he waited for Kenny to pick up on the other end. He tapped his lap nervously, until finally, the screen changed from black to something more appealing. Kenny stared at the screen, fussing with his messy blond hair, before beaming at Stan.

“There's the college boy!” Kenny said.

Stan laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah, here I am.”

Kenny was the first (read: only) person to try to contact Stan. Stan could have made excuses for Kyle that he was busy, but Stan wasn't stupid. It wasn't the first time Kyle had tried to avoid him. Stan pushed that thought aside, focusing on Kenny instead. Even on a crappy screen, he was still so cute.

Kenny was using his phone to call - it was Eric's old phone, who resisted giving it to him. The only reason he gave him the phone was because Kenny wouldn't stop being disgustingly gay about Stan, and Eric gave it to him under the condition he would never mention Stan again. Kenny took the phone, then immediately started talking about Stan again. He ran before Eric could take it back.

The camera quality wasn't perfect, but Stan could see Kenny, and that was all that mattered. Seeing him made his heart leap. Memories of making out on Stan's bed flashed in his head, something he had to quickly push out. He wasn't going to get himself going with Kenny right there.

“So, how's it going? Miss me yet?” Kenny asked.

“Good. My roommate's kind of an ass,” Stan said.

“Aaaaand…?” Kenny leaned his head in his hand.

“And I miss you.”

Kenny leaned forward, looking smug. Of course Stan missed him - it was the first time they had been apart. Stan leaned his elbows on his desk, his head resting on his hands.

“Damn straight. Are you gonna show me around or what?”

Stan's dorm room was small - comparing it to his own home, anyway - but he had enough room for his belongings. He showed off the posters he had hung up, the guitar by his bed, and how he had mostly unpacked. Some boxes were still littered around, but he didn't feel like unpacking them yet.

He was lucky that his roommate shared some of his tastes, though the roommate's side was a bit more gothic and hipsterish than he would have liked. At least it wasn't too much of a clash between styles. Stan put his laptop back on his desk, finishing up the tour.

“Maybe I should come over, see it in person, christen those bed sheets,” Kenny said.

“I think once we're done, there'll be nothing holy about them,” Stan said, laughing.

He put a hand on his chest, gasping in mock shock. “Us? Do something dirty? I can't believe you'd accuse me, Stanley!”

Stan shook his head with a snort. This was where he had chosen to lay his affections, and he couldn't be happier. The only problem Stan had was the distance, but that would work out eventually.

“You know, I don't have to be there for us to have sex,” Kenny said.

Stan paused, before realising what Kenny was implying. His stomach was in knots and he swallowed hard. He could see his face in the corner, and he could see how red his face had turned. Asshole. He grabbed the top of his laptop.

“Great seeing you, but I've gotta go,” Stan said.

“Aw, no, Stanley!” Kenny waved his hand wildly. “I'm sorry! I love you.”

Stan stopped. Those three words made his heart thud against his ribs, and he couldn't help but smile. It wasn't fair that Kenny was using that against him, but Stan never wanted to stop hearing it. For a moment, he had completely forgotten why he wanted to go in the first place.

“I love you too,” he said. “That's why I'd rather fuck you in person.”

Kenny snorted. “What a gentleman. But we both know who'd top, and it wouldn't be you.”

Stan didn't say anything; Kenny was right, but he shouldn't say it. He huffed, bringing his legs up to his chest. He leaned his head on his knees.

“I miss you, dude,” Stan said with a frown.

“Hey, don't go sad on me. I miss you too, but I'll come see you as soon as I can,” Kenny said. “Promise.”

“You'd better,” Stan mumbled.

He knew he was going to miss Kenny, but he didn't know if it was better or worse not knowing how he felt. Stan would never have to find out. They hadn't made anything official, but Stan didn't care. Kenny loved him, that was all that mattered. As long as he had Kenny, Stan was happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops my finger slipped. Did a lil end for the last day of Stenny Week :'D there you go!

**Author's Note:**

> "Stop spamming the Stenny tag on AO3" make me. God I'm so over looking at these ficlets tho...
> 
> Anyway come find me on [Tumblr!](http://vehicroids.tumblr.com)


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